Today I went to see Eric (not his real name) at his foster mother’s home. He’s 2 weeks older than Kimora, he’s 61/2 months old. Kimora is my foster child, well, it will be her name once I adopt. Eric has been in foster care since birth like Kimora and in Ms. Evers’ home since the hospital release. I received the case in May and I’m playing catch up. The case has had about 5 social workers up until I came. I hate that this has happen for the family because each worker has to catch up. You can read the notes but it’s nothing like asking the players, the plays. I know they get sick of it but I understand why social work has a high turn over. It’s stressful. Eric’s case is still reunification, which means the department has to try to reunite the family. I came into the case with that knowledge and as an employee, I’ll do my job. However, Eric’s mom makes it pretty hard to work with her. Eric was born positive for cocaine. He had withdrawals but he’s doing great now in his foster home. His mother went into labor in the hospital totally aware that DSS was on her back. Why? Only 10 months prior we took Eric’s big sister because of her mother’s drug use. But no one found it strange that Eric was born with drug in his system. Mom use to come to visit with the older sister, Jessie (not her name) high as a kite. I mean real high, irritated, not able to walk, high. This is while she was pregnant with Eric.
When I got the case Eric’s mom was MIA. The dept had no clue where to find her. I was told that’s the norm for her. She get a boyfriend, a druggie with some money then she’s no where to be found until jail or the money runs out. As for Eric’s father, she told us a guy named Jay at the motel 6 fathered him. No other information given. I found mom about 2 weeks after getting the case, she was in jail. (most I tell you drug related charges) I visited her in jail, introduced myself and asked her to contact me when she is release. She filled my ear up with how she is coming out and doing everything the court has asked her to do to get Jessie and Eric back. All jail talk cause when she was released she call, she visited, then she flaked. I got her an appointment with a great rehab clinic, she didn’t go. She became homeless after her mother kicked her out for the 5th time. I got her an inpatient clinic willing to put her in a half way house, find her a job and give her support. She told me no. I’m all out of options. She told me she will do it her way, she’ll get a job, and live in a motel. She now prostituting per the locals. The next court hearing we are looking to ask the court for a TPR hearing. Termination of parental rights. Eric’s foster parent would love to have him. They are so attached to him and vice versa. Unless Eric’s mom do something great in the next 3 months, that where we are headed.
Two problems (maybe) Jessie is not living with Eric due to the time she was in care, and her attachment will her foster parents. Jessie dad is also a drug user but at least we know him. He’s working his plan barely, going to treatment but still test positive at times. So Jessie and Eric has little chance to be together is their mother don’t get them. Until recently….
Eric’s mom has a cousin in Nevada that wants Eric and Jessie. This is killing Eric’s foster parents. They love him so much. They do not have children and it would be a real loss. I understand there pain. I think about some family member showing up wanting Kimora, now that I love her so much. It’s been 6 months of me caring for her, it would feel so unfair if someone else was able to weight in on getting her. However, that’s what’s happening to the Evers (foster parents of Eric). I finally spoke to the relatives. I now understand their position. They didn’t know they had a relative in foster care. They also do not have children and wants the chance to keep Eric in the family. Dilemma. Both sides (foster parents and relatives) want me to recommend them for adoption. Then of course mom wants more time. What do you think? What should I do?
For the orginial story 1 Kings 3:1-28
Paraphase
One of the qualities most ascribed to Solomon is his wisdom. One account, that of Solomon suggesting to divide a baby in two to determine its real mother, is from the Old Testament of the Bible in the book of Kings. In this often-quoted passage, two prostitutes came before Solomon to resolve a quarrel about which of them was the true mother of a baby. (The other’s baby died in the night and each claims the surviving child as hers.) When Solomon suggests dividing the living child in two with a sword, the true mother is revealed to him because she is willing to give up her child to the lying woman rather than have the child killed. Solomon then declares the woman who shows the compassion is the true mother and hands the child to her.
Amazing Events of my Life that will Enlighten,hmmm well maybe just Entertain.... 
December 5, 2007 at 12:33 pm
This is a very sad and heartbreaking story. I am sure that the foster parents love Eric very much and will feel so much sadness if they have to give him up. However, I do believe that because Eric is so very young, it would be better for him to be with a family who is willing to accept both Eric and Jesse. I personally feel, that it is all so much better to know your history and be with your family, if possible, as you are growing up. Most often, the importance of growing up with your family does not manifest until pubity, when we all have major identity crisis going on.
Your reference to 1 Kings 3:1-28 was very enlightning. Solomon was indeed a very wise man.
This type of work has to be very stressful; especially if you have a heart, as I see that you do. It just makes me want to take them all home and love them, love them, love them. But one person can not save them all.
I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts, and keep little Eric and Jesse in them too. If there is an update to this story, as there is no date on the blog page, I would be so grateful if you would keep me up to date.
Peace and Blessings to you.
Thank you for your input and understanding I have a really difficult job.
As for Eric and Jesse, I dont make the decision if they go to family or not, it goes to a panel. However, Jesse’s parent and Eric’s mother has express that they want the children to stay with the foster parents who are in the state and not to go to Eric and Jesse’s cousins. They have no real relationship other than sharing comment grandparents. That will be taken into consideration. I don’t think a resolve will come until late winter when the prenatal rights are terminated, until then we hope they stay where they are since the relative does not want them until they are free for adoption. Go figure?
April 29, 2010 at 10:34 am
Wow I feel a closeness to this story, because of the similarities of the condition of my birth and because of my name (which is Eric) The differences is, one I had a praying Grandmother, and a mother who eventually conquered her demon, I have never held it against her and forgive for all her mistakes, and thank GOD he saw fit to allow me to leave Kings County Hospital and to live my life as an instrument for him! Keep us appraised of the progress and know that he as well as the family will be in my prayers!